Losing Sucks

Deallocate-12/09/2016

A pair of black heels and an unusually large hat were off to the side of the training arena. Their owner was a few feet away, engaged in an elegant battle with an immobile training dummy. The barefoot herbalist Shanoa was using a wooden practice blade to dash and flip around the dummy, slashing away at it when she saw openings, and dodging imaginary strikes from her cunning foe. In all, it was quite a masterful performance, if not for one fact: Shanoa had virtually no upper body strength, and her strikes would have opened up only the smallest cuts on a human foe, even with a proper sword. In fact, it was all she could do to keep her grip on the blade as she conducted her dance. Finally, she leapt back and pointed her blade at the training dummy with a determined expression. "Your reign of terror ends here, Count Albus. No matter how handsome or charming you are, I shall hold to my mission with steadfast abandon!" She dropped into a stance, and prepared to strike. "My love for you will not distract me. Your life is forfeit!" The herbalist dashed forward, swiping her sword at the dummy as she passed. To her credit, the blow hit harder than her previous slashes. So much that it penetrated the straw exterior of the dummy, and lodged itself in the wood of the interior. Shanoa twisted her wrist as the sword was wrenched from her grasp. She stood behind the dummy, massaging her wrist as she looked at the sword sticking awkwardly out of the dummy she had named Albus. After a few seconds, Shanoa stuck her tongue out at it. "Cunning ploy, Count Albus. You win this time."

NethaEmerald-12/09/2016

Valerie wandered slowly around town, her right hand held across her left side and left hand dangling down. Clearly she was still hurting after what had happened a few nights ago, even if it seemed much longer than that. Thankfully not every step brought the pain searing through her body, though when it did, all she could think back to was how easily she lost that fight, despite how good she thought she was on the battlefied. "Gods... I swear, i'm never going to live that down..." Valerie sadly thought to herself as she had to take a small step, wincing slightly in pain. She probably wasn'y fit to be moving around this much yet, but she was growing bored at the base camp, which is why she was heading off for the Training Grounds. Once she got closer to the grounds with her slow saunter, she heard a voice. "Maybe watching a match will help ease me; study their techiniques to inprove myself." She thought to herself as she got closer to the entrace, not having much difficulty getting into them. Once she got in, she was quick to notice the hat and knew who was here. Without much of any second thoughts to it, the Sword Fighter eventually got into some of the space off to the sides with seating and aimed to take a seat, carefully doing so. Once sat down, Valerie looked to see she hadn't been spotted yet. She hadn't heard the first part of Shanoa's seeming rambling, but she heard the part about love and that was enough. She nestled her left hand over her sword handle once sat down and watched as Shanoa got the wooden sword stuck in the dummy. With some soft laughter, Valerie spoke up with "Might want to work on that." though her voice wasn't as confident as it normally was.

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Shanoa's turned quickly, her hair flying outwards as she turned to face her newly-arrived friend. "Uaaah?!" she uttered in shock as her face colored slightly. "You didn't see any of that!" The herbalist's shock took a different turn when she took stock of Valerie, though. The other woman usually stood up straight and proud, but there was a defeated quality to her now, as if she was a plant that was wilting away. Shanoa frowned in consternation. "Hey, Val... you doing okay there?" She quickly approached the stands, her injured wrist forgotten for the moment. "You're not hurt, are you? You know you can always come to me for herbs or remedies if you're injured, ri-" With a start, Shanoa remembered the last time they had seen each other. She had forced Valerie away from her. One of her few friends, and Shanoa had turned her back on her. She looked down in shame. Oh. Of course. I pushed Val away, and as a result she never came to me for medication. I pretended I was doing it for her benefit, but in the end I was just being selfish... Shanoa shook the thoughts aside. Feeling bad about her past decisions wouldn't help her now. "Uhm... yeah. Haven't seen you in a couple of weeks."

NethaEmerald-12/09/2016

Valerie just gave a small smirk to Shanoa insisting that she didn't see any of that, but made no verbal remark to the part; she wasn't about to make any promises about it. When the next topic was flung upon her about how she was doing Valerie gave a small nod and said "Just got beat up in the last battle was all. Healers have been doing fine looking over us." Valerie knew she was lying, but besides Churchill, she wasn't quite ready to admit she had actually been bested in a battle given her battle style and self-reputation. Maybe some other time, though now wasn't it. "Not since you fell last battle." Valerie remarked, and even then, it was only for an instant: they had gone seperate ways on the battlefield, after all. Valerie looked down at the hand across her sword handle for only a moment, gazing down at the ring that sat on it. It clearly wasn't the one she had before. She looked back to Shanoa but didn't say a word. She didn't say anything because it was at this moment she realized what that ring looked like...

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The red-haired woman noticed Valerie glancing down at her ring, but said nothing of it. She didn't have that before, did she? It's an... interesting design. Shanoa narrowed her eyes after Valerie waved off the injury. "Right. Like I'd believe that for a second. You're obviously in pain." She sat down on the seat next to Valerie, and her hat somehow scuttled over to her in a matter of seconds. "No offense to my good friends who are healers, but healing magic will always be inferior to simple herbs and roots. Humans are people of the earth, and it only goes to reason that earthly materials agree with them best." She began pulling out a variety of poultices and remedies before gesturing to the other woman. "Come on, shirt off. Let's see this injury of yours."

NethaEmerald-12/09/2016

Valerie looked at Shanoa with a deadpan look when she insisted that her shift come off. "It's doing fine; don't worry yourself." She insisted back to Shanoa. "I appreciate your concern, but the wound is closed and healing. Just still sore is all." She really didn't want to have to take her shirt off if she could avoid it, mostly due to self-confidence, but she didn't want anyone to see how... big the wound itself was and how far it dug across her. Valerie instead looked back to the dummy and spoke back "You should focus more on how to handle the sword so it doesn't come out of your hand. I'd recommend trying different materials for the grip on the handle."

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Shanoa stuck her tongue out at Valerie. "Fine, have it your way. But don't come running to me when it get infected." She gave pause. "Uhh, on the chance that does happen, you should come see me. Quickly." Infections in that day and age were notoriously difficult to deal with. Usually one would just lop off the offending limb and be done with it. But Valerie's entire side was cut... She glanced back at the dummy when her friend drew her attention to her sword. "Oh. Uhh, yeah. You might have a point. That one is of my own design, and it's somewhat lacking." Shanoa looked down at her elegant and dainty hands. "But I'm not sure improving the grip will help that much when the lightest of blows makes me drop it."

NethaEmerald-12/09/2016

"Finally... just let it be; i'm fine." Valerie remarked in her head. She was getting a little tired of everyone telling her to be careful, have her wound looked at, and to basically sit around and do nothing. Granted, she wasn't even in the shape to do much, but she got here just fine, so it wasn't that bad. She was probably going to be fine by the time the next battle started. "You'd be surprised." Valerie spoke back. Every sword she had was wrapped in a specific way which felt natural in her hands and helped keep it from moving too much when it would be swinging around. "Find what feels comfortable and make it work." She looked down at the handle of the katana in the scabbard. It held small 'notches' in very specific parts, which is where her fingers rested while holding it. The material was soft yet firm. She eventually just pulled the katana from it's scabbard and said "Like how I wrap the handles of my blades." "Except this Pen I got..."(edited)

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The young herbalist took note of the shape of the grip and nodded. "I see what you mean. But I kinda doubt it'll offer much improvement unless I physically tie my hand to the weapon." she said with a chuckle. Shanoa pulled a small roll of bandages off a seat where she had placed them seconds earlier and stepped back off the stands onto the sandy turf. With a small smile, she turned back to Valerie. "Okay then, Val. Show me how it's done." After walking over the the dummy, she pulled the blade out with effort and glanced over it, trying to decide the best way to wrap the grip.

NethaEmerald-12/09/2016

"..." Well, this wasn't what she was expecting to do today. She never really helped anyone else out with their weapons, but it seemed like today would be a forced change to that. When the witch came back, Valerie wasn't even sure where to start. "Uh... start by trying to force the blade from your hand and adding more to the spots that slip easiest?"

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Shanoa did as she was instructed. She placed her lithe fingers over the smoothed hilt and then did her best to wrap the bandages in such a way that it would be thicker between her digits and allow her to have a stronger grip. When finally done, she set it down on a seat between them and frowned apprehensively. The results were... sub-par, to say in the least. It looks like somebody had set out to make an elaborately wrapped gift of the sword, only to run out of wrapping after the hilt. Shanoa sighed. "You know, it's things like this that make me think I'm not suited for more physically demanding activities. Even basic coordination is beyond my grasp..." She looked back at Valerie. "How did you get so good, anyway? You've got more skill in your pinky finger than I have in my whole body."

NethaEmerald-12/09/2016

Valerie watched as Shanoa gave a shot at it. When that failed, she looked to the other woman and said "Just like with magic: practice." She took the sword that Shanoa tried the technique on and basically undid a lot of what was done, only to do so again with marginal success. "And i'm not even a master at what I do: far from it." She really wasn't in the mood to hear mopey, self-depreciating crap from others right now, even if she wasn't going to admit that. "Just have to give everything you do your all and everything will fall into place."

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"Hmm." she murmured as she hefted the wooden sword experimentally. "Not bad." After making sure she was a safe distance away from Valerie, she practiced a few swings. To her credit, she didn't immediately drop the weapon. Which wasn't saying much. "Thanks. Hopefully that helps a bit." Shanoa sat back down and poked Valerie. "Okay, I've gotta know. What's up with the ring? You keep looking back down at it. Something's on your mind."

NethaEmerald-12/09/2016

"Just tweak it until it feels right." Valerie responded with without putting much thought into that statement. When she was poked on her side, she looked to the witch as the other woman asked her question. As soon as it had come out, Valerie had recoiled a bit back as her face went just a tiny bit red. She knew the implications of the ring and hand now, which was she was getting embarrassed about it. "Uh... nothing much." She lied, looking away to conceal her slightly red face. "I... just found it on the ground and decided to wear it is all." She said. Technically, she wasn't lying: the ring rolled to her on the ground, even if she was lying about how it got to her.

December 10, 2016

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Shanoa frowned petulantly. "Oh. I understand why you wouldn't want to tell me." she said sadly, looking down. "I also know you weren't at the infirmary after the most recent battle, meaning that you didn't get that wound during it. So you're hiding something about that as well." The young woman twiddled her fingers aimlessly. "I won't ask you to tell me, if you'd rather keep it secret. I can only hope that someday you'll come to trust me." Shanoa said, suddenly turning to Valerie and offering her a sad smile.

NethaEmerald-12/10/2016

... With the sad look on Shanoa's face, Valerie felt bad about not telling Shanoa about it after the other woman expressed interest in the topic. With a small, confused frown, Valerie eventually responded with "It might be a long one." She took a deep breath as she prepared herself for this story. "It was well after you fell in battle. We were getting reinforcements to help us storm and reclaim the castle from the enemy army. Amongst them in the second wave was someone I served in the Barentian army with: a Wyvern Rider named Kristyn. Thing is, it wasn't a fun reunion. We kind of parted ways on bad notes, and Kristyn was basically ready to strike me down in the battlefield as a result. I did talk her down, but after our march here, she had been following our army, or more specifically, me. I knew she was coming, but I told nobody else. Regardless, when she came for me, I knew I couldn't back down, not after I won the last time we dueled." Valerie pointed down to her chest and stomach area at this point. "If it wasn't clear, I lost this time around. She didn't kill me, but instead called me weak. She also said that despite how much she wanted to hate me and strike me down earlier, she... missed me. She wants me to come back home to Barentia after this whole situation with Finn is over." Valerie cleared her throat out at this moment; it was clear she was struggling retelling this just a little. "After all this time, I thought she hated my guts and wanted me dead... turns out she just missed me and wants be back, presumably in her life. I ditched who was my best friend at the time to help Finn out. In the wake of it all, she left this ring behind... I never got to know the intent behind it, but I know i'm not letting it go."

Deallocate-12/10/2016

Shanoa's eyes were wide. "Are you sure you're fine with all this? I know you've had time to digest it, but's it's alot to take in." She cocked her head. "Not to mention that this friend of yours has some interesting reactions to things. But who am I to judge. Maybe stabbing people you miss is a Barentian thing. Which brings the question: How do you feel about this?" Shanoa looked down at the ring. "I suspect there's more to that. After all, you're wearing the ring on your forth finger. Which has a whole slew of implications to go along with it."

NethaEmerald-12/10/2016

"Yea... not my brightest idea: I should probably move it at some point." Valerie remarked without hesitation about the placement of the ring. When it came to everything else, Valerie took another deep breath and responded with "As for how I feel? Confused. Conflicted. A medely of other emotions. Really, it's complicated, and that's the best I can sum it up as. Do I feel guilty for making the choice I did to help Finn? Not at all. Do I feel bad for kicking Kristyn's ass when she tried to stop me? No. Do I feel bad about leaving her behind to help Barentia in this convoluted way? Sort of. It was clear she missed me, despite how she put it. I don't like seeing others upset and conflicted, but there isn't much I can do now without running away from this problem back to Barentia. I already made the choice to stick with Finn here, and i'm going to see it through. Is it going to be easy? No, mostly because what Kristyn said to me and what she did is going to eat at me for a while. I just wish I knew what she meant and how she felt about it all instead of this darkness i'm in about it..."

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Shanoa leaned back in her seat, her hands propped behind her head in thought. "You say it's not going to be easy. But on the bright side, you don't have somebody actively pursuing you for a duel anymore. Sure, you've got some guilt, but nobody's ever died from that before." Valerie's friend gave her a thumbs up. "That's a net increase in my book." "That isn't to say it's as simple as you make it out to be." she said as she idly ran her fingers over her sword. "You say you don't feel guilty about joining Finn. But at the same time, what this friend of yours said is eating away at you. If you were truly guilt-free, you wouldn't let it slow you down for a second." The fire mage flashed Valerie her most charming smile. "Don't let it get to you. What's done is done. Nothing can be done about it. You've got a mission, right here, right now. Thinking about Kristen isn't going to help your situation with her or with us." She nodded confidently, hoping to inspire the same confidence in her friend. "The Valerie I know wouldn't let anything so petty stop her up short. She'd take everything as it came to her in stride. Slowly, but with the utmost skill. I realize she means alot to you. But brooding over it won't help you in the least."

NethaEmerald-12/10/2016

Shanoa... had a very good point. If she truly weren't guilty about her current decision, she wouldn't be feeling all bad and stuff right now. Of course, it really wasn't that simple; Valerie felt bad aboutabondoning what was her best friend without so much as a second word after the first duel, but she wasn't going to get into that. "I guess you're right. Despite recent revelations, I need to focus on what I came here to do, and, as you said, take it in strides." Valerie smiled back at Shanoa and said "Well, this certainly helped to clear my head up." as she gripped her side again. "But the physical pain still lingers... hope it heals soon; it looks to be almost done." She remarked as she slowly stood up from her seated position. "Anyways, I think I ought to go and take it easy for the rest of today; no sense in pushing myself beyond my limits."

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Shanoa gave a small salute. "Glad I could help. With the mental side, at least." She seemed concerned when Valerie painfully stood up, and dug through her hat momentarily before pulling about a small ceramic jar. "You may not want me seeing your wound for whatever reason, but at the very least you should take this." she said, offering the small jar. "Spread it thinly on the wound each morning, and it should help with the pain. Careful not to use too much, though. Because, uhm..." Better she doesn't know. "Because it's bad to use alot of it." she finished lamely. "I hope you get better." she said, sounding much more chipper. "And remember, don't be afraid to ever come to me if you need help, or just want to chat. That's what friends are for, after all."

NethaEmerald-12/10/2016

Valerie nodded to Shanoa and said "I'll keep it in mind. Anyways, see you around." as she slowly sauntered off, feeling mostly better.

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As soon as Valerie disappeared from view, Shanoa let out a large sigh as the smile slid off her face. Gah. That's troubling stuff. And I thought I had it bad. Beside her, Shanoa's hat gave an inquisitive squeak. She patted it comfortingly. "Hush, it'll be fine." She stood up and placed the hat on her head, a resolute expression on her face. "I'll just be sure to keep a close eye on her."

===END RP===